There are times I dearly wish the dogs and I could have open, clear communication. I imagine it might go something like this:
Dear Delilah,
I love you very much and am so proud of all that you have accomplished in the four and half short years you have been with us.
There are times when your intelligence knocks my socks off, like how quickly you took to agility and how when we are walking and your leash becomes snagged you stand there calmly waiting for me to free you.
Then there are times when I am left shaking my head and wondering just what the hell you are thinking.
You have a tendency to destroy things, and really I am ok with your destroying toys that I give you, however I really have a problem when I come home to find you’ve eaten:
a stick of butter,
a bag of chips,
destroyed a box and rearranged the paper plates.
And while I’m cleaning up that mess; you go in the shopping bags and take out the grapes. Delilah, there is a reason I don’t give you grapes, they are dangerous for you; they can kill you!
Can you enlighten me, as to what goes on in that chocolate brain of yours?
With much love,
Mama
Dear Mama,
I believe you are referring to yesterday morning when you ignored my hint that I was bored and wanted something to do. Okay, so you threw the ball a couple of times, then ignored me and went into the kitchen where you tempted me with a fresh stick of butter.
Do you remember butter Mama? And the butter wrapper you used TO LET US LICK.
You made yourself something to eat and then without even sharing anything, got dressed gave me a garlic tablet and left. A garlic tablet! What kind of dog do you think I am?
I thought about that butter and its salty goodness and I couldn’t help myself Mama, I had to have the butter! Once that stick was gone my appetite was whetted and I started looking around for something else.
I thought about the table in the dining room and how you are always shooing me away from there and I figured there must be something good on it. Unfortunately I had to lick a few plates, and chew a little cardboard before I hit the mother load.
Those potato chips are good, but I don’t have opposable thumbs Mama, (you said it tonight when you insisted on going through the door before me) my only resource is my teeth, so I tore that bag up getting those chips. But oh the saltiness, it was well worth the disapproving look you shot me when you saw it.
I’m sorry you don’t approve of my methods Mama, but quite frankly I don’t always approve of yours, like making me lie down or sit for my food, or how about that long leash you make me drag around, or that bath you gave me yesterday after my wonderfully smelly roll in the field, and the way you make me wait until exactly 9:00 before giving me my treat.
Think about it Mama and you will realize the blame for yesterday falls on you.
I love you too.
Delilah
Ooh Delilah got the last word there 🙂
She sure took me to task! LOL Thanks for stopping by.
LOL now that is a conversation.
Our Golden once ate glass Christmas ornaments and the Nativity set, (even baby Jesus was not spared). I think you have it easy with Delilah. 😆
I have some Christmas ornaments that I made for my first Christmas away from home 33 years ago. I call them my ‘babies’ and they go in a special box and are always on my tree.
The first year we had her, Delilah ate an elf. We have to block the tree off from her. Granted she has never eaten a glass ornament, but she has chewed some serious plaster. LOL
Did you have to take the dog to the vet?
LOL – It sounds like Delilah made some very good points. Sounds like you have a smarty paw on your hands! 🙂
LOL yes I think she would tell me!
I shudder to think what Our Best Friend would say to me if he could!
LOL I can only imagine what she says, but she has a very strong personality.
YBF would tell you how much he loves you. 🙂
Jodi this post definatley put a smile on my face and I can just picture such a conversation between you and Delilah. I do wish we could get in their head to see why they do what they do 😉
I’m sure if she could talk she would be arguing it out with me. Glad you enjoyed the post.
Totally on Delilah’s side in this. Her case was well stated even without a lawyer.
Sure….Jan, take the pooch’s side. 😉
LOL. Perfect! I imagine that is exactly how the conversation would go. Dogs are nautral debaters. They have us before we even open the door. It sounds to me like you and Delilah communicate very well!
Just imagine your conversation with Shiva, Kristine. Now that would be something! LOL
Deliah you said it all so PERFECTLY. Perhaps SHE will catch on NOW!!!!
She might Frankie, she just might. 😉
Thanks for the laugh. You did a good job of putting yourself in Delilah’s paws!
We are afraid to put up our Christmas stuff this year. Lila starting gnawing on the picture frames that we had out on our table, and I still cannot get her to stop taking the tassels off of the drapes.
It’s hard to pay attention to them all the time. I might have to give Lila a bag of chips and see how that goes! Just kidding.
LOL, Maryann, we put our tree in a corner and I gate it off. Even still there is a good probability she will get an ornament.. 🙂
Try stuffing a kong for her and see how she likes that.
Very funny 🙂 Sounds like the communication between me and the tall person 🙂
Do you sometimes wish you could actually let him know what you are thinking?